Archive for June, 2010

rational thinking is for the weak…

Posted in Pregnancy on 27 June, 2010 by juniper76

Ok, I’m losing it.  But only a little…  Well…

I’ve had nausea since before 4 weeks.  There wasn’t much back then, but it has steadily gotten more intense and more constant week by week.  Right up until Thursday.

On Thursday it disappeared.  8w1d seemed awfully early for that to happen.  I started to worry.

Then Friday I had this feeling in my throat, like impending vomit.  It didn’t matter what I was doing – sitting, standing, talking, staring at the computer screen – I needed to know where the nearest bucket (or equivalent) was.

Saturday was more of the same, except I managed to eat breakfast simply by getting out of bed and eating before I had time to think about it.

Then Saturday evening, the nausea returned!  Such relief!  Until it disappeared again a few hours later…

Around the time the nausea disappeared again, I had some spotting.  I have to admit, it was a teeny, tiny bit of brown and arguably brown CM rather than just brown, but my rationality has disappeared with the nausea.  This just scares me now.

So, by bedtime it was back to the throat thing.  Only, for the first time, it went from “impending” to “actual”.

And with all these things worrying me, I’m now also worried about the amount of weight I’ve lost since the start of this pg.  My pre-pg BMI was 38, so it’s not like I’m about to waste away, but I know weight loss during pg is not generally recommended.  But I’ve also heard that some OBs tell their plus size patients to lose some weight.  So far, through no deliberate attempt on my part, I’m down 7kg (15lb).  I’m wondering if I should be calling my OB to mention this?  My first appointment is still another 4 weeks away.

It has been such a long, hard road to reach this point that I’m terrified it’s all going to be taken away.  I’m scared and no amount of frequent peeing or excess emotion is going to allay those fears…


early days…

Posted in Pregnancy on 19 June, 2010 by juniper76

Yesterday morning we had our first scan.  We had the first appointment of the day (8.00 am) and I was worried about arriving late (like I had for both betas), so we ended up arriving 30 mins early.  When we arrived our FS still had a waiting room full of patients waiting for their daily monitoring (done between 6.30 am – 8.00 am).  When I say full, I mean standing room only.  So DH & I went next door to the clinic’s waiting area instead and watched tv for half an hour.

When we went back at our scheduled time, the room was still packed and there were even people waiting outside the door in the corridor.

About half an hour later the room had cleared enough for me to get a seat.

Another 15 mins and our FS was finally ready to see us.

And it was straight down to business.  I don’t think I even managed to sit down before being directed to go into the next room for the u/s.

At first DH was doing his normal “I’ll just wait in this room here rather than watch someone stick something up there” routine, but once we were set up he did join us.

After having a quick look at my ovaries, we got down to business and he located one little blob in my uterus, measuring exactly on time (7w2d).  Towards one end of that blob, there was a pinpoint of light flickering away – the heartbeat.

No photo; no measurement of the heart rate; and yet we couldn’t be happier.

three questions…

Posted in Pregnancy on 16 June, 2010 by juniper76

I’ve been sitting here pondering…

  1. Did I really want morning sickness?  Nausea is reassuring, but it’s meant to go away when I lie down.
  2. Will anyone notice if I put my chair back and have a nap at my desk?
  3. How about if I crawl under my desk?

Yep, the big questions facing our society.  Just over 3 hours of work left today… but how much work will I get done?  I guess that’s question number 4…

ps. In my defense, I have already sent off two reports this morning, so I have been productive.  Well, two versions of the same report, but there were edits done between the two versions!

more waiting…

Posted in Infertility, Pregnancy on 7 June, 2010 by juniper76

Just when I thought maybe my last 2ww (for #1) was behind me, I’m faced with another.  Our first scan is scheduled for 2 weeks after last Friday’s beta.  So, I’m 3 days into another 2ww and this one is going slower than I could ever have imagined!  I’m sure some evil genius somewhere has built a machine to stop time.  How is it only Monday?!

On the plus side, I feel like things are progressing.  I’ve had nausea, fatigue and sore/heavy breasts for over a week now.  But late last week the nausea started getting stronger and today has been the strongest yet.   I feel like it’s trying to get a running start for the official benchmark for the onset of morning sickness – 6 weeks.  I’m rapidly reaching a point where I can’t brush my teeth without gagging (and sometimes vomiting) and this morning I couldn’t face breakfast.  I’m also still coughing from whatever sinus issue I’ve got going on and that too is approaching a dangerous point of tipping over into something more… regurgitative… in nature.

Funny how all of that is a plus side, isn’t it?

But I have learned today that I love plain crackers right now and I am craving salt.

Oh, and I’ve also learned I’m not going to get any work done in the next 11 days…  Oops…

a week later…

Posted in Infertility, Pregnancy on 4 June, 2010 by juniper76

Sorry for the super quick post right now.  I have to leave for a meeting in about 15 mins and haven’t finished reading the material.

We had our repeat beta this morning and the numbers are:

  • hCG: 3,622
  • P4: 461

Our doctor wanted to see the hCG increase by 10 times and we exceeded that!

We’re booked in for our first scan in 2 weeks.  I just can’t wait!