Archive for May, 2009

…and today’s magic number is 3

Posted in Infertility on 30 May, 2009 by juniper76

I called this morning for our fertilisaton report – 3 eggs fertilised.  60% is pretty close to the normal fertilisation rates.  We’re not doing ICSI, so that’s all DH’s boys keeping up their end of the deal.

Actually, the number 3 seems to have been dogging this cycle from the beginning…

  • I recently turned 33
  • DH & I recently celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary
  • It’s our 3rd IVF cycle
  • I was taking 333.3iu for the FSH – it was supposed to be 325iu but I worked out I could dial it up one extra notch and still get the same number of doses out of the vial
  • That number of doses was 3 – 3 doses/vial
  • We’re doing our first 3dt
  • We now have 3 embryos

Now all I have to do is pray that it’s 3rd time lucky…

Starting numbers…

Posted in Infertility on 29 May, 2009 by juniper76

Back from ER.  We got 5 eggs this time.  Could have been worse, but had hoped for better.

Seem to have a bit more pain this time.  The cramps have settled down, but I’m getting pains in my sides, particularly the left.  I think I’ll be going through the Panadeine Extra a bit quicker this time.  Hope I don’t have trouble getting more.  The pharmacist was a bit unhappy about me buying the two boxes I’ve got.

Now the long wait for tomorrow morning.  Have to call the scientists at 9am to find out how many embryos we’ve got from those eggs…

12 hours to go…

Posted in Infertility on 28 May, 2009 by juniper76

12 hours to go to ER…  Not that I’m counting.  If I’m lucky, I should get to spend most of them asleep!

12 hours to ER and then probably an hour after I’ll find out how many eggs we’ve got to work with.

Hard to think of much else at the moment.

On the down side, I’ve picked up a cold.  As long as there’s no sign of a chest infection I’ve been told we’ll still go ahead, but it’s still a nagging doubt at the back of my mind.  Dry cough, headache, aches and pains, fatigue… all but the cough could be the IVF drugs so hard to know what’s what.

Heading to bed in 15 minutes…  I really hope tomorrow goes well…

Full steam ahead!

Posted in Infertility on 27 May, 2009 by juniper76

So, as you can guess from the tagline, the main thing on my mind these days is fertility.  Or rather, the lack of it.  My wonderful husband and I have been trying to start our family since January 2007.  After 12 months of failing to conceive the medical profession classifies you as infertile.

For the record, infertility (IF) sucks.  It has consumed our lives and thoughts.  And, after months of testing and treatments, our official diagnosis is “unexplained” IF.  Great.  What that means is that after 29 months we’re still not pregnant, but they can’t find a reason why.  Doesn’t mean there isn’t a reason, just that they can’t find one.

Right now, we’re in the midst of our third IVF cycle.  I’ve been sniffing the synarel (to suppress my body’s production of hormones) since early May and today was my 12th day of puregon injections (to stimulate the ovaries to grow follicles from which eggs are retrieved).  My Dr was on holidays last week so I’ve had next to no monitoring, which is fairly unusual and more than a little nerve-wracking.  Normally I’d expect to have at least two scans (ultrasounds) to see what those ovaries are doing and two or more blood tests to see what the hormones are doing.  We did get the two blood tests, but had to wait until today for our one and only scan.

If I had to sum up today’s scan in one word, it would be – disappointing.  But, hey, that pretty much sums up the last 29 months of my life, so maybe I’m predisposed to it?  We never seem to get a lot of eggs.  It may just be that I don’t respond well to the normal downregulation protocol, or maybe my ovaries just simply resent being asked to work so hard?  Either way, we’ve collected a grand total of 6 eggs for each of our first two attempts at IVF.  Based on today’s scan we’re probably looking at a similar number this time too.  I’m just hoping it won’t be fewer.

The problem is that not all eggs will fertilise and become embryos.  And not all embryos will grow and have even a chance of becoming a baby.   Ideally, what the clinics aim for is around 10 eggs.  More than that and the risk of OHSS increases.  But, then again, I got mild OHSS with my 6 eggs last time.  And I know others who have been OHSS-free with 20 eggs.  Seems pretty random to me, but try telling that to the doctors…

Anyway, we saw about half a dozen follicles on the left ovary at about 16-18mm.  They’re considered mature at 18-20mm so a few of those are a little on the small side.  But it’s the right ovary that has let me down – just one stinking follicle at 26mm.  I think if it had been earlier in the week he’d have had me do another day or two of injections to grow those lefties just a little more.  But in the choice between collecting the eggs Friday or Monday, I guess he thought Monday was too late and Friday was the winner.  So, we trigger tonight and Friday morning we find out just how many eggs we’ve got in our basket.

Addendum…

Posted in General on 26 May, 2009 by juniper76

I created my account at WordPress.com weeks ago.  It took me until now to come up with a name for my blog (another symptom of my depleted creative writing skills).  After choosing it, it didn’t take long for me to find out there is a porn star called Amber Rain.  Typical.  Hopefully that skimpy little “s” at the end of my title will keep me out of Google search results for Ms Rain?  Probably not, but at least I should end up at the end of the search results with any luck.

Anyway, I’m not changing it.  I like the name I came up with – it has meaning.  It even has layers of meaning.  Ms Rain can go about her business and I can go about mine, and never the twain shall meet…

A beginning, of sorts…

Posted in General on 26 May, 2009 by juniper76

Where to start?

I’ve been thinking about this for a long time.  I’m not sure how good I’ll be at it?  But, for now, I am writing for myself, not an audience.  So I guess it doesn’t matter how often I post or how insightful those posts are?

My reason for testing the blogging waters is a simple need to express myself in any way I want.  I won’t be telling my friends about this blog – I don’t want them to know I write it.  I may have to tell my wonderful DH though because he always complains about not knowing what’s going on in my head.  Never mind that it’s probably safer for him not to know…

So, why the need for self-expression?

Once upon a time I knew how to write for fun.  In high school I was good at writing – essays, reports, creative writing, whatever.  Years of university and then work have slowly beaten my creative writing skills out of me.  I can write a kick-ass formal report, but ask me to write even a simple poem and it’s like getting blood from a stone…  I miss the beauty that words can create.  I miss flexing my creative muscles.  The words “use it or lose it” have never seemed more pithy.  So, forgive me if I lapse into formality, if my words read like a dry report, I’m learning (again).

Yes, there is more to it than this, but for once I am choosing to get to the point in my own sweet time.  Aahh, the freedom!